Wednesday, April 17, 2013

4/14/2013 - The OTHER Surprise...

In case you were wondering, yes, I love surprises.  So, today started like any other Sunday morning.  Me and little man were up early, Melissa was trying to sleep in some.  Later on, little man left to spend the day with his grandma and papa.  I hurry to do some laundry for our overnight excursion.

About a week ago, I emailed the Jefferson Hotel, in hopes that they might be touched by our story enough to invite us for our Anniversary.  The Hotel manager messaged me back, within a day, gladly helping me surprise Melissa, at no cost to us.  At this point, she is still unaware of where we are going.  The morning led into the afternoon, as we waited for laundry.  Even when that was done, Melissa still was not motivated and just didn't feel well.  Despite that, though, she eventually dragged herself together.  After we left, she found out that we were going to the Jefferson.

We arrived to a busy registration area....that awkward moment when a beat up Hyundai pulls up to a 5 star motel with Lexus', BMW's, and Caddy's all around.  First time the Hyundai has seen Valet action.  Large fountain drinks and luggage in hand, we strolled into the amazing lobby.




I thought, "WOW, we are out of our element."  I said to Melissa, "Probably shouldn't have these soda's in here."  haha....acting as if I was on my mother's living room rug.

Upon check in, the desk clerk says, "I am not going to tell you the kind of room you have...I will let you be surprised."  Before that, all I expected was a basic room....obviously we had quite an upgrade I was unaware of.


Suite?  Oh boy....

I open the door to this...






I was beside myself.  Melissa....she is so hard to read.

The Jefferson was first class...all the way.  The support staff and accommodations are amazing.  Even the bottled water was fancy.  I had never stayed in a place that nice.  Many Presidents...hell, even the ROLLING STONES rented that room!

We went to dinner at the Capital Ale House (compliments of some good friends).

We had a good night, though, I could tell she did not feel well.  I did manage to get her swimming for a bit in the indoor pool, after which, she wanted to nap.

I wondered around the hotel...alone.  I sat at the bar for a drink...alone.  I was almost desperate for someone to be excited with.  I should have brought little man with us.  Later on, I actually got a little upset that she was not more excited...she was not interested much in seeing the hotel.  Her reactions seemed to me like we might as well had been staying at a Ho-Jo's....though she assured me she was having fun.  I guess I had some cooked up expectations of what a person who has NOT been through hell would act.  As you can tell, since this all began, I work my ass off all the time to try to put a smile on her face...an uphill battle, at best, and sometimes, just an impossible task.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

4/12/2013 & 4/13/2013

4/12/2013

Fridays are special days for me.  The end of the work week also spells a much needed break from the grind...though, weekends are how I catch up on the house and such, it is just nice to have some time at home.  Weekdays are so hectic...run, run, run...and that is without doctors appointments and such.  This weekend, though, is special.  Saturday is Melissa and I's 11th Wedding Anniversary.  Saturday will be a rest day for her and a catch-up day for me, but Sunday I have a big surprise planned.

Friday also marks me and little man's weekly trip to Game Stop.  He was pretty good this week, so we went.  It sounds like an expensive trip, but we always buy used games.  Sometimes we trade a few in also, which most times helps it cost under $5 a trip.  He loves it, too, and works hard (most weeks) to make sure he does well enough in school to go.  I can not lie, though, I also love video games.  Lately, after little man is in bed and the house settle down, I settle in to some Tiger Woods 2014.  I love golf, but I am afraid when I go out to play, it does not love me back much, but the video game...I excel...it loves me.


4/13/2013

Melissa was not feeling good today.  At best, she maybe sleeps 2 or 3 hours at a time.  The roller coaster of one minute feeling normal and the next being drained and exhausted...most the time, staying exhausted.  Now that the radiation is done, I hope she gets up and is a bit more active.  I think it would help her sleep better and improve her overall health.  She has mentioned wanting to get a small part-time job, but I have not seen her on her feet for more than a couple hours since her surgery.  I think she needs to be a bit more active to get back to working.  Doctors still have not directly cleared her to work, anyway.

So today was just me and midget.  We did some yard-sale'ing and cruising around in the country.  Later we both did some picking up around the house.  I had to do some laundry for my big surprise overnight'er with Melissa.  She does not seem to be very excited....though, she knows little about what we are doing.  I suppose it is hard to get excited when you feel like crap.

I was thinking, today, that I have not cooked a good meal in quite a while.  I am always an hour behind come dinner time....not to mention I flipping HATE doing dishes (though, lately I seem to be the only one who will do them).  I feel like I have to get back to cooking, despite the dishes.  So, tonight, I whipped up some French Toast, something I do very well.  Even our dog April knows when I am cooking French Toast. Chili is on the horizon.

Friday, April 12, 2013

4/11/2013

We found out that Melissa was approved for SSD benefits, but that the starting date and waiting period put us 2 months away from any income from that.  Those dates being adjusted also mean much of the medical debt is ours to pay.  Needless to say, we are scrambling to keep our house now.  I will likely have a car for sale soon.  I will have to plan several fundraiser yard sales.  The online fundraiser's end date will have to be moved up.  These next couple months will be a true test of will power, planning, and our support systems.  There is no doubt, we will need help to get through.  So many have already helped so much...it just sucks to still be sinking...but that is part of Cancer, too.  Just have to roll with the punches...

Here is the link to the fundraiser.  Please share it, Tweet it, Email it....let's have one final rally....as I will be forced by need to close it soon.


Story time....

A recent movie remake gave me a flashback.  I can remember my parents, when I was pretty young (8 or 9), taking us out the the drive-in movies out on Rt 460....The Evil Dead....a classic.  I love that movie and can not wait to find someone brave enough to come with me to see the new one.  My parents did a great job exposing us to some cool stuff.  I remember one Christmas, my dad, I am sorry "Santa", got me some cassette tapes (the same Christmas I got a nice Walkman).  I asked him, "Who are Guns and Roses?"  I remember being pissed off about it...at that time, Lord knows what I was listening too, probably MC Hammer or something equally as stupid.  Lies and Appetite for Destruction...two of the best albums every recorded, in my eyes.  .I had no idea, until much later in life, just how cool that was....not to mention, how far behind everyone else I would have been had I had to discover G'n'R on my own.  They tried with Bluegrass too....Seldom Scene, Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, Old and In the Way....I hated it when I was young....now, I love it and plan on torturing my child with it as well.  haha....

Thursday, April 11, 2013

4/10/2013

So, unknowingly, it seems I may have set the bar quite high for this weekend's 11th Wedding Anniversary (April 13th).  Just after the dust settled from the Limo excursion, Melissa said, "So, what do you have planned for our Anniversary?"  Great question...oh boy.  At least a good friend of mine, who happens to share the same anniversary day, is as well planned as I am.  Got to get to work on that....

Looks like some of the National early morning news picked up the story.  Who knows who was watching.  Pretty cool.

Today we found out when Melissa will start SSD benefits....and I can tell you, the 5 month waiting period is going to be a nightmare.  We have been blessed to get so many gifts and help already....muscling up to cover these last couple months before she gets income is going to be really tough....but you get by, right?  I said that before on the blog...my words....live by them, right?

Ever seen a radiation mask before?

X marks the spot!



Tuesday, April 9, 2013

4/8/2013, 4/9/2013 The surprise...

3/8/2013

Monday, the day before the last treatment.  Melissa is pretty tired.  That walking in Virginia Beach wore her out.  Today, I work out the kinks in my big plan.  Because I am posting this after-the-fact, I can share some of the details that went into planning.  So, I really has this all set up for last week, when her schedule was extended....but both Laura Geller (NBC12) and Brockwell Limousine were very cooperative.  Today, I talked to both Laura Geller and Brockwell Limousine to confirm plans.  Talked to Melissa's best friend to make sure she was coming, though later, I spilled the beans on her coming for the bell ringing, quickly follower by her re-convincing Melissa that she was in-fact NOT coming (though, she definitely was coming for the Limo ride).

I have never truly planned a successful surprise for Melissa.  This was not due to a lack of trying.  I tried...she is good.  When not distracted by medications, cancer, and all that, she usually catches on that something is up.  Just last week, she said, "I kind of want to make a big deal out of the bell ringing" (the bell ringing ceremony signifies the end of treatment and getting on with life).  Be careful what you wish for...


3/9/2013

Today started like any other work day for me....but it will be far from it.  Today, my wife finishes radiation.  We will not know for weeks whether she is out of the woods or not.  Doctors say that this kind of brain cancer you don't cure, you learn to live with.  Brain cancer has you constantly waiting...waiting for more treatment....more doctors appointments....more scans....more tests.....often leaving you with far more unanswered questions than answers.  It is hard to "get on with life" constantly not knowing....but you just do. What choice do you have?

So, after a few hours at work, I headed home to help orchestrate my surprise.  Then...I get a text from Laura Geller about filming in my living room....uh oh.  See, cancer not only wrecks your finances, it gets up in the middle of the night, dirties dishes, spreads dog hair, and scatters toys about....oh wait, that's actually our fault (and the dogs)....haha....so I rushed, cleaned and got things ready just in time.  Melissa's best friend arrived shortly afterwards to help as well.  Then I rushed off to get Michael from school.  When he walked in with me, Melissa knew something is up.

The news interview went very well.  I chose Laura Geller to approach with our story, just knowing she would find the right angle to tell our story.  I did an amazing job not talking over Melissa and letting her answer the questions.  Melissa was kind of shocked about that.  See folks, I do have self control.  After the indoor interview, she wanted to tape outside (our cover for the Limo surprise)....I knew Melissa would not scream or cry (even warning the news that she would not be one of those crazy screaming happy people).  Her initial reaction was as expected but she did seem more excited than I expected.  Turns out, this was her first Limousine ride.  Oh, that's a couple extra brownie points for me.  The ride was cool, made even better by having a few of our favorite people along for the ride.  After her treatment, we all got to come back to witness the bell ringing.  It was nice...she cried.  One nurse said, "We are going to miss you grumpy face around here."  haha...I bet.  She did not shy away from speaking her mind....think our Neurosurgeon took her governor out.  After a nice ride home, we went to celebrate at Longstreet's.  I took a detour to post pictures and email some pictures to Laura Geller...technically, my photo-journalistic works were publish on television....can I add that to my resume?  Needless to say, my surprise worked out very well.

Here is link to the story!

 http://www.nbc12.com/story/21923868/local-company-donates-limo-ride-for-cancer-patient

Special thanks to Brockwell Limousine....those guys are class acts.  Provided it free of charge today.  If you know anyone with cancer in treatment, tell them about what they did for us....they would do it for them too.  Also, please tell your friends and family to use them if they ever need Limo services.  The also do group trips and have a larger van for those.

http://www.brockwelllimousine.com/

Special thanks to Laura Geller for doing a great job capturing this special day.





Monday, April 8, 2013

Another Blog Worth a Follow....

I have mentioned this blog before, but the Liz Army blog is so good.  Liz is like a superstar cancer warrior...an inspiring story that is still being written.  This post hits SO close to home.

http://thelizarmy.com/2013/04/support-groups-are-not-for-everyone/

Like her, my blog and followers are my support group.

Thank you for following my blog....it just would not be as fun without dedicated followers.

4/6/2013 and 4/7/2013 - Virginia Beach

4/6/2013

For a couple of weeks now, we have really needed to get away.  Seems like I am always in a constant battle of "Can we afford to?" and "Can we afford NOT to?" in my own mind...this was a trip that was probably 60% need, 40% want...but I found a good deal on a nice place, so we got up, packed the car, and rode down to Virginia Beach for the day.  I booked us at the Oceanside Inn.  This was actually a pretty nice place....little aggressive about the "NO SMOKING" policy, but pretty nice inside.  You could tell, at one time, this was a very smoking friendly place but times change....free Americans become Socialists, but I will save that for my other soap box.  I chose this place for not only it's more affordable rates, but the indoor heated pool.  It was still a bit cold for walking the beach, so the pool paid off.  I took midget for a nice swim, after which, we cleaned up and went out to diner.  The Beach Pub was the researched choice for diner (featured on Drive-In's Diners and Dives).  This was a dive, but full of character and pretty good food for a fair price.


4/7/2013

This morning, we ate at the hotel restaurant, which was good but way, way expensive.  Turns out the advertisements on the elevator for a $5 breakfast were only available through the front desk, so our breakfast cost about as much as diner the night before (bacon and eggs for the same price as steak and shrimp)....I was kind of pissed, but canned it well and enjoyed my breakfast.  So our plan was to walk down Atlantic to an arcade we spotted the day before.  It was a bit more of a walk than Melissa had undertaken in a while.  She did well, though, and made the trip...and the arcade was epic.  I had many a flashbacks to the old Aladdin's Castle days at Walnut Mall in Petersburg.  Arcades are a dying breed these days.  The walk back required us to take a nice midway break...and lucked upon a nice NY Pizza/Italian joint...after which we strolled back to the car.  Took little man to the water's edge.  Of course, he got drenched in cold, cold water, but insisted he was ok.  haha....love that little guy.

Here are a few pictures...


Family Deals?  Really?  Is this a thing now?  ...and no, we passed up on this family offer....along with passing on the body jewelry and Hookah Starter Package.





He loved that heated pool.  Bit more chlorine then I care for, but we had fun!



This Neptune statue is cool.  Huge too....we may even come back for the Neptune festival, depending on if our tax money clears in time.