In the cancer world, no health news is not good news or bad news. No news is, well, no news. It is something you get dreadfully used to when dealing with cancer. So, obviously, I have little to report. The posting for the 22nd of this month should have a pretty important update.
I have been trying to push Melissa back to some level of activity. It is hard because, since this all started, I have been more of the "comforter" than the "motivator", and I fear, shifting roles could result is some hurt feelings or misunderstood intentions. I just want her back, ya know. I not sure she is convinced she can get back to where she was.
I feel like I am in a constant state of struggle...trying to balance work, our son, worry, the house, the bills....it is a lot of stress. Most times, I handle the stress pretty well; sometimes I don't; sometimes I rock back and forth from both extremes in the same day or hour. I would love to have more time to focus on family, but, like most Americans, I have to "feed the monster". What I mean by that, is I work hard to pay my bills knowing all the time that I will likely never be able to pay them all off, much less ever retire, live debt free, or save money. Even before cancer, I felt it was a near impossible up-hill battle...after a cancer diagnosis, though, I know I will likely never buy a house, get a decent rate on a car loan, or have affordable health care. Sure, I could be one of the millions milking the system and become yet another burden on society...but I choose not to. Call it pride or "having principals"...really, it is what I feel like I am supposed to do.
I had a great conversation with the president of an outstanding non-profit, The Chis Elliott Fund - http://chriselliottfund.org/. No matter if you are a new brain cancer patient, in treatment, or a survivor, you should reach out to them. For new patients and those in treatment, they offer some priceless knowledge on Brain cancer and the chance to put your medical history in front of a panel of the best doctors in the United States for a collage of second opinions....something that, frankly, could save your life. It is unfortunate that our health care system seems more geared towards making money than curing disease...after all, it is a business. Every case of brain cancer is different.... literally thousands of variations, yet there are only 3 generally accepted forms of treatment. The Chris Elliott Fund can help put in in touch with the doctor that best suites your needs...and if nothing else, reassure you that the doctors that are treating you are doing so with the best means of treatment available, saving you precious time. You should never just blindly trust a doctor. Sometimes, one form of treatment may declare you ineligible for a medical trial that could save your life. How is a normal person supposed to know these things? Most do not...and shouldn't, for that matter. We are all not neurologists. Who better to ask than people who live and breathe brain cancer every day.